Bad Habit
And that was something Veralidaine Sarrasri was keen to avoid.
'So this is what drug addicts feel like when they try to go cold turkey...' Daine thought, catching herself shaking her leg vigoriously before forcing herself to stop. To still. She closed her eyes and turned her face up to the sun. 'I'm here... at the beach, away from civilisation, away from distractions, to contemplate, to go cold turkey and to stop my bad habit.'The sand felt cool under her and she flopped down, spreading her legs and arms, trying to make a "snow angel" in the sand. The breeze tickled her face and ran playfuly through her hair.
She wondered briefly on where all this excess energy was coming from. She was never a fidgety person, never twitchy. Yet, now, she was all, shaking and movement, hoping from one foot the other, ocassionally bursting into "Damnit" and "I'm a stupid fool" temporarily stunning unsuspecting passerbyers.
Still.
Yes, she needed to be still. Serene. Calm. Like the sea.
She curled onto her side and thought, 'When did this bad habit first start? Hmm... It was that Numair Salmalin who suggested it. The one who lulled me into this habit, the one who is the cause of this situation! Why oh why, did I go along with his suggestion though I stupidly knew somewhere in the back of my mind that it was a bad idea?'
"ARGHHH!!!" She screeched, abruptly flopping onto her back, scaring some birds into flight.
Her conscience pricked her, 'Fine, fine, so it was not entirely his fault. He had never mislead me, he had never lied to me. I just chose to go along, and let my habit become worse and worse and worse and...' She sighed and closed her eyes against the glare of the sun.
She felt gently yet oh so familar lips caress hers, before the kiss deepened such as to make her toes curl. She opened her eyes as the person moved on to nibble on her ear.
"What are you doing here?" She asked.
He nuzzled her neck, "Finding you. You've been avoiding me."
"Of course I am," She muttered, "And you are supposed to be co-operative and stay away."
He paused and frowned at her. "Why are you trying to avoid me?"
She looked directly into his dark eyes and said, "Because you are my bad habit."
"Your what?"
She twisted away from his arms which were much too distracting. "You're my bad habit Numair Salmalin. I'm in a bad habit of contacting you everyday, of thinking of you, of being too reliant on you even though I know you are only temporarily in my life. There's just no logical reason why I should talk to you, become emotionally dependent on you when I know that I'm not your type. I know that this is just a summer fling before we all go back to university. There's just no good reason why I should feel compelled to seek you out in the first place when I know that this is going nowhere. That when university starts, you'll be back surrounded by your usual blondes, I'll be back with my books. I look at your previous flings, and they are better than in me in every single way. I don't deceive myself into thinking that I'm prettier, heck no, I don't even delude myself into thinking that hey, my personality is so much better and I'm a much better person than them. Bull shit. Your previous fling Jenna was a good hearted character out of a book. Where she would patiently wait for a mother with a pram to move out of the way in a crowded place, I would most likely go, 'move your big fat ass. you shouldn't be bringing your baby out in such a crowded place and blocking people's way, if you want to stop, go to the side you inconsiderate twit!' And so correspondingly, I should try and get someone around my standards, and not someone out of my league."
Daine rolled on her belly and tried to jungle crawl out of his arms when Numair simply let his weight rest upon her.
"Ah yes Daine, why didn't I think of it that way as well," Numair said, ignoring her mutters of protest. He leaned over to rub his nose against her cheek, before resting his cheek against hers. "I am the top student in the university, you're an average student. You're from an alright family background, but my parents are from old money. I'm six foot five, purportedly one of the best looking people on campus while you go by. Not too ugly, not drop dead gorgeous-" Daine elbowed him at that. "- yet here I am, in this bad habit of wanting to touch you, wanting to hear your voice. Hunting you down maniacally when I don't see you. Coming to this isolated beach and walking around like some dog looking for his lost master. There is no logical reason why I would do such things when there are far better girls available."
Daine closed her eyes. "So we're even. We have a bad habit. There is no way to explain this but that we just developed such bad habits over this holiday."
Numair flipped Daine over, surprising her with his strength before trapping her with his weight. "My dear Veralidaine Sarrasri, just because you are doing something that is illogical and without any reasonable basis necessarily means that it is a bad habit."
Daine raised an eyebrow, and sighed, "We're suffering from some mental disease?"
"No..." Numair replied, "This is called love. That though objectively you may not be the best, but to me, you are everything I want or need. I think you have the most beautiful eyes with an incomparable shade of not blue, yet not grey. I like how you are a good hearted person, yet with your own faults so that you ground me, yet I won't feel too stifled or unnatural around you. Because you understand weaknesses, having some of your own, and you are able to accept me as I am without holding me to some impossible standard."
He gently stroked her cheek, "I love you Veralidaine Sarrari." He kissed her deeply and so tenderly that her heart skipped a beat.
"I still think you're a bad habit," Daine said, clearing her throat awkwardly, breaking the moment. Numair growled and nipped her on the neck. She smiled.
Labels: Drabble
